冷笑话
共 102 条
- I was sorting through the shoes in my closet the o
- I was helping your mom fold laundry the other day,
- I was at the grocery store this morning, looking f
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-
- Why don't secrets last long in a garden? Because t
- I was helping my kids with their science project,
- I was at the beach with my family, and we spent th
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too hi
- So, I was at the bakery this morning, picking up s
- I'm a baker, and I'm feeling crumby today.
- I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was
- I can't believe I got fired from the calendar fact
- So, I was trying out a new recipe for dinner last
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
- I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes; sh
- My computer just coughed, I think it has a byte-er
- I have a strong dislike for elevators. They're alw
- I accidentally swallowed some food coloring today.
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too hi
- I went to a seafood disco last night. I pulled a m
- I was trying to help your mom put together this ne
- I decided to get a job at the bakery. I figured I
- I tried to write a joke about a door... but it was
- I tried to write a pun about a pencil, but it was
- I tried to draw a picture of a pencil, but I could
- I was trying to help your mom put together this ne
- So, I was thinking about taking up a new hobby, ma
- I was driving home today and saw a car pulled over
- Why don't secrets last long in a garden? Because t
- So, I was trying to order a pizza last night, but
- So, I went to the library this afternoon, looking
- What do you call a belt made out of watches? A wai
- So, I was at the airport today, picking up your co
- I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough d
- I bought a new vacuum cleaner today — it really su
- So I was wrestling with my computer all morning, t
- Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?
- I don't trust stairs. They're always up to somethi
- I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getti
- What do you call a grape that complains all the ti
- I was helping our neighbor fix their fence today,
- Why did the coffee file a police report? Because i
- What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry.
- I was helping your mom fold laundry the other day,
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was
- I went to the cheese shop today to pick up some fa
- I tried to catch some fog earlier, but I mist.
- Your mom asked me to whip up some eggs for breakfa
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
- I spent an hour this morning trying to fix that le
- I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wa
- I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. It was just g
- I was at the grocery store this morning, looking f
- I was out in the garden this morning, trying to pu
- My pencil broke, so I had to write it off.
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the sa
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
- I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, a
- Why was Pavlov's beard so soft? Because he condit
- When will the little snake arrive? I don't know bu
- Have you heard the story about the magic tractor?
- Wife: Honey I’m pregnant. Me: Well…. what do we
- Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a
- I was fired from the keyboard factory yesterday.
- Dad I’m hungry’ … ‘Hi hungry I’m dad
- Did you know that protons have mass? I didn't even
- What do you do on a remote island? Try and find th
- Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverla
- What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato
- What do you call two barracuda fish? A Pairacuda!
- I’m only familiar with 25 letters in the English l
- I thought my wife was joking when she said she'd l
- Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-ro
- What do you call a female snake. misssssssss
- Slept like a log last night … woke up in the firep
- To be Frank, I'd have to change my name.
- My first time using an elevator was an uplifting e
- What is a centipedes's favorite Beatle song? I wa
- Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it'
- Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to th
- I'll tell you what often gets over looked... garde
- What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A
- Did you hear the joke about the wandering nun? She
- Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad
- A steak pun is a rare medium well done.
- Why was it called the dark ages? Because of all th
- "Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?" "Because if
- How come the stadium got hot after the game? Becau
- I won an argument with a weather forecaster once.
- I knew I shouldn't steal a mixer from work, but it
- Dermatologists are always in a hurry. They spend a
- Chances are if you' ve seen one shopping center, y
- I accidentally took my cats meds last night. Don’t
- Where do fish keep their money? In the riverbank
- What did one nut say as he chased another nut? I'
- Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road? Because he
- Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side w
- I'm tired of following my dreams. I'm just going t
- 为什么鱼从来不看牙医？因为它在水里刷的牙，医生看不见。